Subject: The designated driver


The other night a cop was parked outside a local neighborhood tavern.  Late 
in the evening, the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that 
he could barely walk.  The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few 
minutes with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man 
managed to find his car which he promptly fell into.  He was there for a few 
minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.  Finally he 
started the car, switched the wipers on and off, flicked the turn signals on 
and off, tooted the horn and then switched on the lights.  He moved the 
vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained stationary 
for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left.

At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the 
road.  The police officer, having bemusedly waited all this time, now started 
up the patrol car, flipped on the siren, promptly pulled the man over and 
carried out a Breathalyzer test.  To his amazement, the Breathalyzer 
indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all.

Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll need you to accompany me to the 
station.  This Breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the man. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."