You Know You 're A Redneck ......

If you have a set of salad bowls that have "CoolWhip" written on the side...

If the biggest city you've ever been to considers Walmart to be a boutique mall

If your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV...

If you thought the Unibomber was a wrestler...

If you've ever used your ironing board as a buffet table...

If you think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart...

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you
home...

If you've ever used a toilet brush as a back scratcher...

If you've ever asked the preacher "How's it hangin'?"

If you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty...

If you think fast food is hitting a deer at 65mph...

If somebody tells you that you've got something in your teeth and you take them
out to see what it is...