Great Truths About Life That Little Children Have learned

 * No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
 * When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
 * If your sister hits you, don't hit her back.  They always catch the
   second person.
 * Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
 * You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
 * Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
 * Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
 * Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.
 * Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
 * School lunches stick to the wall.
 * You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
 * Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
 * The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma's lap.