About $$$
     
A fine is a tax for doing wrong.  A tax is a fine for doing well.

Always borrow from a pessimist.  He doesn't expect his money back.

While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own 
form of misery.

Gambling:  The sure way of getting nothing for something. - Wilson 
Mizner

I embrace poverty.  To annoy me send money.

Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye.

My doctor is wonderful.  Once in 1955 when I couldn't afford an 
operation, he touched up the x-rays. - Joey Bishop

A banker is a man who lends you an umbrella when the weather is fair 
and takes it away from you when it rains. - Mark Twain

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car 
payments. - Earl Wilson

Blessed are the brief for they shall receive lower phone bills.

Credit is what keeps you from knowing how far past broke you are.

Where there's a will there's an Inheritance Tax.

It's trying not to appear poor that keeps a lot of folks broke.

Advertising (n):  The science of arresting the human intelligence for 
long enough to get money from it. - Stephen Leacock

The trouble with cash flow is that the tide always seems to be going 
out.

"Ever wonder why the IRS calls it Form 1040?" asks Jay Leno.  "For 
every s50 you earn, you get $10 and they get $40."

If the good Lord had meant for us to pay income tax, He'd have made us 
smart enough to prepare the return.

If you think nobody knows you're alive, try filing your income tax late!