You might be an engineer if.. At Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burned out bulb in the string of Christmas lights. Choosing to buy flowers for your girlfriend or to spend the money to upgrade your RAM is a moral dilemma. Everyone else on the Alaskan Cruise is on deck gazing at the scenery, and you are still on a personal tour of the engine room. In college, you thought Spring Break was metal fatigue failure. The Salespeople at the local computer store can't answer any of your questions. You are at an air show and know how fast the skydivers are falling. You bought your wife a new CD ROM drive for her birthday. You can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie. You can type 70 words per minute but can't read your own handwriting. You comment to your wife that her straight hair is nice and parallel. You go on the rides at Disneyland and sit backwards in the chairs to see how they do the special effects. You have saved every power cord from all your broken appliances. You have more friends on the internet than in real life. You know what http:// stands for. You look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys. You see a good design and still have to change it. You spent more on your calculator than you did on your wedding ring. You still own a slide rule and you know how to use it. You think that when people around you yawn, it's because they didn't get enough sleep. You window shop at Radio Shack. You're both in the backseat of your car, she's looking wistfully at the moon, and you're trying to locate a geosynchronous satellite. Your laptop computer costs more than your car. Your wife hasn't the foggiest idea of what you do at work. You've already calculated how much you make per second. You've have tried to repair a $5 radio.