HOW TO TALK ABOUT MEN AND STILL BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

1. He does not have a beer gut; he has developed a
   Liquid Grain Storage Facility.

2. He is not quiet; he is a Conversational Minimalist.

3. He does not get lost all the time; he discovers
   Alternative Destinations.

4. He is not balding; he is in Follicle Regression.

5. He is not a redneck; he is a Genetically-Related
   American.

6. He is not a cradle robber; he prefers Generationally
   Differential Relationships.

7. He is not short; he is Anatomically Compact.

8. He does not have a rich daddy; he is a Recipient Of
   Parental Asset Infusion.

9. He is not a bad dancer; he is Overly Caucasian.

10. He does not hog the blankets; he is Thermally
    Unappreciative.

11. He is not a male chauvinist pig; he has Swine
    Empathy.